Aftermath

So I've really put the most mortifying experience in my entire life out there for the world to see, but you know what?  I really think this experience was everything this chick needed.  It took me down so many notches for a hot minute, but I kind of think it brought me back even fucking stronger than before!  It reminded me that I have the most amazing support system ever!  Fucking Ever!!!  You always read about how women should lift each other up and support each other - I have never in my entire life relied on anyone else.  I bottle everything up, yet wear it on my sleeve with no explanation ever or insight into what in the world is bugging me.  The women closest to me know that, they give me my space!  They love me, they worry about me and they are always there when I need them the most.  They uplift me in so many ways and I am so very thankful for that.

I spent some time meditating and reflecting.  I dressed up and took my little sister out for dinner!  I wore my hair down, kind of a big deal for me but something that is getting easier each and every time I do it.  While part of me still thought that maybe red bearded farmer was everything I wanted in this life, if only he could meet me, a bigger part of me knows that there is no man on this Earth worthy of my love if they don't have the time of day to even do that.  I learned so damn much out of this experience and the pain was so short lived, but the lessons are for life!  I trust there is a man out there that will blow my mind in every way and I'm learning to not settle for anything less!

I am so damn strong, beautiful, kind and I am on a journey of a lifetime right now.  Not many people can let go of everything to find themselves, but I do hope that everyone can certainly try.  Life is too short to live life any other way than Happy!